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Hoboken St Patty’s, In All Its Debauched Glory

February 23, 2011 by  

Despite Hoboken’s mayor cranking the St Patty’s day fines up to $2K a pop (YIKES!), the people will rage on. Just check out this Craigslist post from a couple of Hoboken guys looking to hire a dwarf for their St Patty’s party.

Dwarf needed for Hoboken St. Patrick’s Day 3-5-11 (Hoboken NJ)
——————————————————————————–
Date: 2011-02-13, 12:44PM EST
Reply to: gigs-4r9xc-2212372247@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
——————————————————————————–
We are in search of a dwarf to hire for St Patrick’s Day. We will pay $400 for 10 hours. We will provide you with a leprechaun outfit. You will follow us around town and hang out at our house party and pour shots of Jager Bombs down everyone’s throats. We will give you along with the $400 all the booze you want and we will pay any cover charge at the local bars. Please be under 3′ 6″ and be a male. Enjoy getting shit****faced with a bunch of fun Hoboken alcoholics and know how to have a good time. Two years ago our dwarf got laid twice by 2 drunk gals at 1 party, we are inviting them back this year too. This will be the time of your life. Please send resume.

Location: Hoboken NJ
it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: $400 flat

I’m especially curious if the two chicks who nailed the last dwarf realize they are being used as bait to lure in a new one? I’m sure at some point they figured people would get over it, but here we are two years later and it’s now on Craigslist. Behavior like that just doesn’t wash off. And about this resume business – do you think the old dwarf put on his resume that he crushed two girls at St Patty’s while dressed up like a leprechaun? If so, should I be putting stuff like that on my resume?

June 2006 – Branchville, NJ
The Third Base Pub
• Forcibly removed from the premises for not wearing a shirt and peeing beside the pool table.

I’m just kidding… they would never kick me out of the Base. Thanks to Russo for showing me this post.

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